sapphire02's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Enough of emotions I am not doing good today. I had to go into work. My throat is tickling. I am fighting and I am tired. Where can I run away? I hate my life. One day I'll be able to write something more positive. I pray anyways. I still ate too much. WHy, cause I'm always upset and I mindlessly eat. Then my stomach hurts. How can one be anorexic and COE? Now I see why most ana's don't have boyfriends. It screws up everything. If I could be anywhere I'd live on a mountain, it would have a lake and very few people. Just friendly. I'd have a garden and I'd take care of my children. I'd meet this really great guy who was perfect in every way. He never looked at another woman. He protected me. He was sure of himslef. No more insecure men for me. It would be lovley. I know it's a fantasy, but hey, with a life like mine you have to dream. That's getting hard enough to do. Usually I don't think of anything. Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. I saw a horrible accident today. I really don't know how I almost forgot. I was washing my car when a motorcycle came barreling down this main street. It was going over 50 in a 35 mile lane. Another car didn't not see him and pulled out in front of him. Bam, you could feel it in your bones. I yelled at me husband to call 911. Then I picked up the phone and dialed the police too. Two people on the bike. A woman and a man. The man was awake but bleeding from his face. The woman had really weird sounds from her breathing. Like she was snoring from her mouth. They had to trach her. Right there in the street. Poor guy. It wasn't his fault that he hit them. He was just pulling out from church. Nice older gentleman. He was in shock to say the least. My son saw the whole thing as well. Didn't even faze him. He just walked back home and started washing my car. Interesting day. I'm tired of emotions for awhile though. It's enough now. 10:18 p.m. - 2002-10-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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