sapphire02's Diaryland Diary

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damn it, why does he read LJ?

I did so well today. Not eating at all. Then I came home and found msgs that were not very nice. What did I do? I ate a huge bowl of beef stew and two slices of cake. Why is that bad? I don't know, I just don't want it in me. I'm not supposed to eat wheat. That's why I've gained so much. So I am about to head to the kitchen and pour me some Diet Pepsi.

Shakes head He's gonna call me. I don't want to answer him back. He's getting tired of competeing with this and his about make me choose. I can't... I will never be okay enough to never ever do this again. Further more, I really don't want to. I like/hate my illness. I can't survive without it.

He wrote that he was jealous. Why? My time is all about him. Not this. He's mad because I don't get better just because suddenly someone cares about me. It doesn't work that way. I will have to just be more careful about where I post.

Here it is, my diary and I can't write....

6:36 p.m. - 2003-12-06

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