sapphire02's Diaryland Diary

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Not to bad is it?

I have a throbbing headache it started all because I ate fast food and kept it down. Not that I had planned on keeping it, but my aunt and uncle came by today just when I was about to go off into the bathroom.
I accidentally told my husband that I was struggling with this again. I didn't tell him I was actively purging or anything...
He was upset, asked if I had been lying this whole time.
I said no, that just because I said that I'd try and recover, didn't mean I was going to have my bad days too.
Bad month is more like it.

I keep looking at the calories of what I ate 1030. That's not too much is it? I mean 500 of it will be burned producing breast milk. So that leaves 530. I fI look at it that way, it's not too much.
My mind is disordered, look at how I'm justifying it. I have to though. How else can I bear that?

2:05 p.m. - 2006-03-15

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